Top Ten Signs You Have A Bad Commencement Speaker
From the David Letterman show
10- The entire speech is "Testing 1, 2, 3...testing"
09- He's wearing a cap, but no gown -- boing!
08- Only bit of wisdom: "There's a white Ford Taurus with its lights on"
07- His introduction: "And now, the equipment manager for your
06- The repeated references to how delicious grape jelly is
05- Halfway through the speech he chokes on his tassel
04- He leaves early to beat the traffic
03- Angrily denounces so-called "book-learnin'"
02- Thanks to the honorary degree, he's now Dr. Hasselhoff
01- It's Oprah, But it's not the Oprah
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